BREAKING: Peter Molyneux Says Some Stupid Shit, Sun Rises In East

Apparently, Heavy Rain has absolutely blown Peter Molyneux’s mind. The recently-released spiritual successor to Dragon’s Lair has so disquieted Lionhead Studios’ resident genius/constant embarrassment that he felt the need to heap on the hyperbole (as if it needed any more).

By way of Joystiq:

“I recommend anyone who wants to start to see the first glimpses of the future of video games to go out and buy it…there’s no question in my mind that games like Heavy Rain — games that have a new fidelity in the way that they present their experiences; obviously made with cinematography and motion capture in mind — can really show the way forward to a new form of entertainment, which is evolving the story and choices and consequences… [the QTE] really meant that you had to pay attention all the time because you didn’t know whether these quick-time events were going to come up”

Well that’s fantastic. Apparently the future of video games is hyper-boring point-and-click adventures comprised entirely of quick-time events. Oh, and with the worst fucking controls and voice acting imaginable. Aaaand a story with a twist ending that literally CHEATS its own logic and gameplay elements to provide a bullshit surprise that makes about ZERO sense. And the most shameless female character exploitation since Bayonetta.

Oh but the STOOOOORRRY is emotionally involving, which is just REVOLUTIONARY. Fuck you, Peter, go play Silent Hill 2 or Braid or Ico or Out of this World for a little while. Probably not pretentious enough for you.

But I guess I don’t know why I’m so surprised. Peter Molyneux pretty routinely talks up his OWN snoozefests as megaton revolutionary culture-bombs too, only to have them be eventually revealed as strict genre exercises. Why shouldn’t he do other developers the same favors he does himself?


About djsharpecheddar

Have you seen a little girl?
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